How did I get such a profane child?
I'm sure my mom is reading this right now and thinking "You're surprised your child is profane?", and really, she's probably right. I recall sitting in the backseat of the car on one of our many marathon car trips as a child and being thrilled to see graffiti that said things like "Eat me like a taco", which soon became one of my favorite sayings, and telling my parents in response to something they said "That's nice, and I don't mean the nice nice, I mean the smartass nice." just to be sure they knew what I meant. I guess I'm not surprised that my 21-month-old swears, I'm more impressed with his amazing accuracy.
You see, every time, really every time, I drop something or he breaks a glass or I stumble or whatever, he says "oh, man!"*, "Scheisse"**, or "F*!K"*, depending on the gravity of the situation. It's really amazing, and no matter how often I tell him that only white trash and Asis (German for trash, more or less) use those words and that people will think he's just that when he says it, he persists in his use of such expressions. The trouble is, most of the time, he says exactly what I feel. Often, I could really just say "You're exactly right" when he swears, but I feel it's not appropriate, because a child who is not yet two should not be using these words. I'm not perfect, I use words of this caliber as well, but mostly in appropriate situations, and not usually in public, because, as I always tell Wilhelm, only trash does this. The main battle is now not to get him to forget these words, because I am sure that they are burned into his memory by now, but to get him to use them at appropriate times.
*he did not learn this from me
**he learned this from me