Haircuts by Bob*

To get my spring break off to a roaring start, I accompanied someone to get a haircut in a town nearby Beaverton on Monday. The sign outside the salon announced a very inexpensive price, so we thought "Why not give it a try?" with the childlike innocence of foreigners. We ventured into the house, which is actually the barber's house, a pretty old house with a funny smell at that. The salon was the front room to the right when one enters the house. We loitered in the hallway next to the stairs after not seeing anyone in the salon area. Out of the kitchen which housed an avocado green refrigerator, probably a collector's item, popped a man's head. "I'll be right up," he announced. So we entered the salon area. Wilhelm was excited to find a cockatiel and parakeet in the corner of the salon, and as I started removing his coat and hat and he was busy peeping at the birds, the barber entered the room and said, "Oh, no, I don't do guys that small, he won't even fit in my chair." Somehow this always happens, at salons people always think Wilhelm's hair should be cut, but we do that at home. Anyway, the correct customer then took out the photos of his best haircut and said, "This is how I'd like my hair." Barber Bob glanced at the photos, tossed them to the side and whipped out his electric razor. "You want a lot off, huh?" was all he said. And did he start cutting! Wow! He turned his customer away from the mirror and shore him like a sheep. His customer had a worried expression on his face, and I probably did too. I decided it would be best to stop watching, and as my eyes wandered through the room, I noticed a giant rifle, much like the one pictured above, standing in the corner of the room. I guess Barber Bob must not get many complaints with that standing in the corner. Or if he does, he takes care of the problem so word of bad haircuts doesn't spread. Or maybe it's there because Barber Bob's shop is across the street from the county jail. Perhaps he has a contract with the police to, um, take care of any inmates that escape street clean up duty. Whatever the reason, it wasn't only the gun that made us pretty much satisfied with the haircut. Where else can you get a haircut for $8.50 these days?

*Barber's name has been changed